Thursday, 31 May 2012

Single Girl Snippet: The Mattress

Excerpt from conversation between me (M) and the kind, middle-aged, tattooed salesman (S) at the mattress store:

S: What exactly are you looking for? And, what is your budget?
M: A queen-sized mattress. Something pretty firm, but not like plywood. The last time I bought a mattress, I loved it in the store but found it a little soft once I was at home. Oh, and my ideal budget is ‘on sale.’
S: We have a 60-day comfort guarantee – why didn’t you just return it?
M: My husband liked it.
S: Uh… Is he still a factor?
M: No. This is my single girl bed.
S: Well, you should know that the mattress model you are lying on features individual spring coils. This is great for isolating motion. You know, for when the occasion arises.
M: It’s going to be a while.
S: Ok… I think I can get you a pretty good deal on the mattress.
M: Thank you.

I walked out of the store after having three separate discounts applied to my mattress set.


  1. You're sly! Very funny!

  2. Thanks - I figured people can only read so much about self-improvement, so I am tossing in the occasional real-life anecdote to lighten things up.