Calling In The One: Fire in the Kitchen Sink

Setting a fire in my kitchen sink was definitely the most therapeutic of all the exercise in my Calling in the One journey.
For anyone who isn't into setting fires, the option of tearing the paper, stomping on the paper, or burying the paper is available. But, for me, this was a 'go big or go home' moment. Burning the paper has a sort of finality that the tearing/stomping/burying of the paper does not offer.

So, what was on this paper, you may wonder?

Make two columns. On the left, you include I RELEASE sentences. On the right, write out a matching I EMBRACE sentence. For example, I RELEASE the hope that the past could have been otherwise. I EMBRACE a future filled with joy and love.

I had four full pages.

I cut horizontal lines so that I had a pile of paper strips, each one containing its matching I RELEASE/I EMBRACE sentences. Then I burned them all one by one. It felt good.

And, the next morning, I woke up feeling like a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders.

Calling In the One: Fairy Tale Ending

 

One of the exercises that I was most skeptical of during my Calling in the One odyssey was writing a fairy tale featuring yourself. But, I was committed to the process laid out in the book. I opened my journal to a fresh page:

One upon a time there was a princess. She was kind of nerdy, but a nice girl overall. In the kingdom, there also lived a dragon. He was a very arrogant, nasty piece of dragon.

Long story short: Dragon pretends to be a nice prince. Princess falls in love with him. Then, she finds out he tricked her. She gets REALLY mad. Dragon gets banished from the kingdom. AND THEN, a wonderfully tenderhearted, drop-dead gorgeous, incredibly intelligent prince arrives and sweeps the princess off her feet. He thinks the princess is beautiful, very smart, and loves how caring she is towards others. The prince also believes in equal division of household chores. They fall madly in love with each other, get married, and have beautiful, healthy babies. Princess then masters the art of baking Dora-shaped birthday cakes.

Sigh... What a great story.

Anyhow, it was actually kind of therapeutic to write it all out. Granted, I felt kind of silly initially. But, in the end, the effort was worth it. So, I toss out the challenge to all of you readers out there to write out your own fairytale ending. Maybe your 'prince' looks like a dream job, or a dream opportunity, or whatever. Jazz it up. Make yourself be a stellar character. It's a fairy tale, after all.

And they all lived happily ever after...

Calling in the One: Room for Two

Above is a picture of my favourite mug. One of my many quirks is that I eat out of a mug more often than I use a plate. This mug is made by Corningwear and is more bowl-sized than mug really. My first bowl-mug was a gift from an uncle years ago. Sadly, I dropped it a while back and it broke. However, the happy ending to that story is that just recently I spotted said Corningwear mug on sale at a department store. Deciding to buy one bowl-mug was a no-brainer. The debate was whether to buy two of them. You see, I was on the "Make room for two"lesson of Calling in the One at the time. Apparently, if you want to attract a life mate, you need to make room in your living space for them and act like they are already part of your life. If I meet Mr. Right tomorrow and he starts spending a lot of time here, then - and I'm embarrassed to admit this - I don't really want to share my bowl-mug. If I get up in the morning, and I can't have my grain-free cereal in my bowl-mug because someone left it dirty in the sink, well, that would be a very sad way to start the day. On the other hand, I've been making a conscientious effort to keep clutter to a minimum in my apartment since moving in. Buying a second mug with the intention of leaving it unused in the cupboard seemed a little counterintuitive. But, in the end, I decided to bite the bullet and just do as the book instructed.

Just in case the mug wasn't enough, I also bought extra hangers. Then, I bought extra clothes and needed to use the extra hangers. So, I bought even more hangers. I only used a few of the second batch. The rest are ready and waiting for either Mr. Right, or my next shopping spree - whichever comes first. Mr. Right wasn't get very much closet space. He does, however, get a small amount of space (one sixteenth) of my Expedit bookshelf/clothes storage system. I mean, really, it's not like I'm going to keep half the closet bare and half my storage space open. (And, let's be honest, how many couples out there really have a 50/50 division of closet space anyways? That's right, not very many.)

Hopefully the mug + hangers + shelf space is enough spacial karma to attract Mr. Right. Time will tell.

Calling in the One

I've recently worked my way through a wonderful book called Calling in the One. As you can see from the cover, the book promises "7 weeks to attract the love of your life." I'm still single, but have no regrets having spent the $14.56 Amazon charged me for the book.

Working through the Calling in the One was a huge turning point for me. This isn't to say that now I'm, you know, built of teflon and all reminders of my marriage just glide off. Not at all. I still have a mini-meltdown every now and again (particularly on days involving interactions with lawyers). However, now I have a lot more insight into why things didn't work out with my husband, and the person I want to be when I emerge from all this mess. Essentially, the person I "called in" was myself. This is important. You can't think of eventually building a relationship with someone else until you are well acquainted (and at peace with) yourself.

In the next few days, I will share some of the more comical moments of this little adventure. The book indicated that you get out of it what you put in, and I wanted to squeeze every last drop of wisdom out of its pages. So, even when skeptical, I followed the exercises. I laughed, I cried. I did things I never would have done otherwise (e.g. setting a fire in my kitchen sink).

Enjoy.

First Solo Wedding

www.openclipart.org

One of my closest friends just got married this past weekend. I had RSVP'd months ago -- sans +1.
I was a little nervous about going to a wedding. It wasn't that many years ago that I was a bride myself. The last couple weddings I attended with my husband, I cried on the way home wishing that he and I could somehow recapture the happiness we had once shared. So, I was worried this might be quite the salt-in-wound experience. I decided to drive by myself so that if I became an emotional basketcase, I had an easy escape.

And then the unexpected happened: I had an absolute ball at this wedding.

I had my hair done that morning and wore a new dress. I felt great. Friends I hadn't seen in months were at the wedding with their husbands, and I was so thrilled to see them again. I ate. I danced. I smiled.

As I looked around at the beautiful landscape and all the happy people, I felt a genuine, profound happiness for the newlyweds. And at that moment, I was overcome with a reassuring feeling that I, too, will find love again.